Here’s another recent email exchange I had with a New Man listener. Enjoy!
(Keep in mind, English is not his first language)
Great contribution to help turning more men into ´New men´. I am definitely on my way, and listening to your interviews is always a source of positive energy and life force.
I just accepted a job offer, returning to a corporate career, I am moving to another place, the middle east.
A complete new environment, new job, but also good opportunity to make some additional changes.
I have accomplished a lot in my life, however, one of the things I am having trouble with is connecting to other men, for friendship, in a profound way, let´s say, finding other ´new men´, without the superficial macho talk. I have never been the ´teamsports´ type of guy, and I feel I have missed out a bit on this ´brotherhood´, go out with the boys, etc… I have wife and family, but I miss a connection to other men.
I live my life to the full, like adventure, and therefore I change my life´s direction about every 5 years, including moving to a very different place in the world. But this does not help staying in touch with ´old friends´ from university etc. Friendships that were easier to establish because of the common goal, studying etc…
Do you have some tips in this direction, or may be would it be possible to have a show with this theme? Finding new man-man relationships, friendship, etc.? I guess I could look more into forming a men´s group, but are there any more ´conventional´ ways?”
Thanks for taking the time to write. It’s great to hear how The New Man is helping you.
As for making guy-friends that are into The New Man, etc. I’ll share my experience.
Years ago, I was into men’s work, spirituality, integral theory — many things that most guys weren’t into. That was what I thought. I was scared to bring up the subject because I feared criticism or judgement from others. I assumed they would not get it.
There in lies the mistake.
When I got serious about this “stuff” I began to speak about it around my existing friends. Sure, some of them weren’t interested and even worse, some of them didn’t really speak to me again. But I quit holding back and I began to at least make it known what I cared about.
Some of those friendships that were flat and more surface-oriented began to flourish. And now, I’m connecting with THOUSANDS of men who are into this “stuff.”
So, I encourage you to speak up. Be skillful and also don’t hold back. If someone asks you what you’re reading or into, share it. If someone asks you what you did last night, tell them you listened to The New Man. Get curious about them, perhaps they are just like you — holding back what is really important for them. Ask others what they find amusing, meaningful and important. Let the connection flow from there.
So that’s part 1.
Online, you could find other guys on similar blogs and sites. The New Man has a Facebook page and we have a private community with The New Man Life where you’re able to meet guys from all over the world that are also into The New Man.
I wish I could say it was easy. It isn’t. But if you’re willing to take some chances, be persistent and patient, I trust that you’ll soon find the community you’re hungry for.
Stop Spinning Your Wheels.
Get Stuff Done.
Developed by professional coach Tripp Lanier, The Daily Toolkit will help you keep your work, lifestyle, and relationships out of Suck-Ville.