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The Blind Spot: Watching a Guy Get a BJ at the Beach
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Below is a transcription of this video.
A few years ago I watched a guy at the beach get a blow job from his girlfriend. Let me explain.
I was in Florida, on my way to the airport after visiting a friend. We were driving along the causeway — which is a thin piece of land that crosses a long body of water. It’s wide enough for a road and a little beach. People gather on these little beaches which are just a few yards from speeding traffic.
Now let me just say that this beach is not the French Riviera.
It was 10:30 in the morning and we were at a red light on the causeway. I look out the window and noticed a young couple just a few yards from the road on their blanket. It only took a second to figure out what they were doing even though their backs were towards the road.
“Nothing to see here! I’m just resting on this blanket with my girlfriend’s head in my lap. She likes to exercise her neck.”
But here’s the thing. This guy thought they were invisible. They were facing the beach and the water. He was scanning let and right for danger – from the people in front of them. He was only concerned about somebody walking up the beach seeing their oral adventure.
Granted, this cat didn’t have a lot of blood in his brain, but he’d completely missed the hundreds of people in a train of cars sitting just a dozen yards behind him.
In other words, his blind spot was obvious to all of us on the road. But not to him.
So what’s the big takeaway here?
We all have blind spots. When we’re on our own, we’re all effectively missing a big part of the picture. Nobody is immune. And blind spots matter because they provide refuge for our limiting beliefs and fears.
Blind spots equal missed opportunities. They’re the reason we stay stuck. They’re the reason we repeat stupid patterns. And sometimes they are so obvious — to everyone except ourselves. They are what our friends talk about when we’re not in the room.
Which means we have a choice:
1 — Act like the blind spot isn’t there (like the lovers above — good luck).
2 — Or expect blind spots to be there.
So what can you do about this?
First, resist the urge to fill your life with people and ideas that simply tell you what you want to hear. Resist the urge to avoid conversations and feedback that challenge the way you want see the world.
And then accept the fact that most of the time your friends aren’t going to tell you about your blind spots. They want to keep things nice and stable so they can continue having cookouts with you and your family. Don’t expect your friends to be that honest with you.
But if you’re extraordinary, if you’re serious about your life and profession and relationships, then you won’t go it alone. You’ll create relationships that are explicitly designed to help you point out your blind spots so that you can function optimally.
This is why guys at the highest level create or join a men’s group. This is why they hire a coach. This is why I still hire coaches even though I’ve been in this growth game for over twenty years.
Blind spots are a part of life. So adjust accordingly.
I hope this inspires you to take some action. And at the very least if you’re getting frisky in public, remember to check your six. Best to you and thanks for watching.