Coaching Practice: Why Jerks Can Make Money
Below is a transcription of this podcast:
Most of my clients are entrepreneurs or other coaches that want to align their business with their values. They want to make great money doing what they believe they were put on this Earth to do.
After being in business for myself for over 20 years and helping many, many others do the same — you wanna know what I think one of the biggest threats is to creating what we want?
Is it lack of time or money or resource? Nope. Folks that really want it figure out a way to create that stuff.
Is it a lack of know-how or expertise? Nope. Folks that really want it learn what needs to be learned.
You wanna know what it is? It’s a “need” to be important. To be special. To be significant.
Now, I’m not gonna bullshit you and act like I don’t enjoy feeling like a big deal from time to time. Everybody does in their own way.
But this kills our business when we focus on being important instead of being effective. We’re in trouble when we’re fixated on that image in the mirror instead of what really matters and what really works. We’re in trouble when we make everything personal. We’re in trouble when we’re convinced that being liked and popular is the same as being a problem solver.
If being liked and popular and adored was the key to creating a thriving business, then how can we explain the metric tons of jerk millionaires on this planet? (FYI, not all millionaires are jerks — that’s not what I’m saying. There are plenty of broke jerks, too. Jerks are everywhere.)
There is no magical popularity contest that determines whether or not your business succeeds. The planets being out of alignment isn’t causing your opportunities to dry up.
Your prospect didn’t bail because the Universe is punishing you.
No. The reason why you didn’t get the client was because your skills need to improve. Period.
Don’t get lost in the “What does this mean about me?” narcissistic-trap where your results are a reflection of your self image and identity.
Your results are far more about your skills — not you personally.
When we make everything personal we simply amplify the problem. Focusing on ourselves keeps us from sitting back and saying “Ok, what skills do I need to develop? What do I need to learn? What needs improvement?”
Jerks can do this. So why not good guys, too?
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