Ok, I’m back with … the rest of the story.
(In case you have no idea what I’m talking about [intlink id=”1999″ type=”post”]click here to read part 1[/intlink] of this personal tale.)
So, in the last post I shared with you how I was standing at the end of a figurative diving board. Many things in my life were shifting and big changes were ahead. I was scared, confused but ultimately I knew I needed to jump.
In a nutshell I had:
- Hit the wall with work
- Gotten a bit of a tease from Oprah
- Realized that The New Man Podcast needed an overhaul
- Moved my wife and baby daughter across the country
- Been wrestling with my own, limiting beliefs (what was keeping me stuck to begin with)
So, there I was — standing at the edge of what felt like a BIG jump. Even though I had the support of my amazing wife and friends, I still felt ALONE. I still felt like there was a lot to lose.
So what did I do? How did I get off the diving board?
I MADE A COMMITMENT
Oooh. There’s that word — “Commitment”. Scares the shit out of most people. Truth be told, I can be a little loosy-goosy. I like a little wiggle room, but I also recognized that without committing to my desired outcome, I was going to stay stuck.
My years in Boulder with the sensitive-types had taught me a new language for “following my truth”. I’d witnessed others and myself use this little trick to basically bail on commitments when the going got tough.
“It’s just not my truth,” usually meant “I don’t want to follow through with that.”
Not anymore. It was time to sack up. I was committing to this change. Come hell or high water I was going to follow through. I wasn’t going to stay stuck.
TAKING THE JUMP
Taking a leap doesn’t mean you have to do so blindly so I created a course of action. Here’s what I did:
Action #1 — I figured out what specific work was invigorating me and what activities were draining me. I had the balls to let the draining stuff go, and I focused on what WAS working. I clarified these “bright spots” and focused on doing these activities more.
End result? Rejuvenation and the satisfaction of enjoying my work again. Fear dissolved.
Action #2 — I got help. I took a big risk and hired a (expensive!) business coach to help me create a sustainable strategy for The New Man. My previous business plan (“build it and hope that they’ll come and then hope that I’ll be magically saved”) was not satisfactory. Even with my years of business experience, I needed outside help. I pushed my ego to the side and paid more than I was comfortable paying to get that help. And you know what? It snapped my ass into gear.
No more loosey-goosey. I was investing in my myself and my family’s future. I was committed. I took my own damn medicine, and it got the wheels turning.
End result? Direction and Restored Confidence. Fear dissolved.
Action #3 — I redefined The New Man Podcast. I decided that I’ll only put out shows that I’m truly inspired to create. I’ll only put out shows that I think are going to jam your junk in a vice of joy. (And I’ve already got a few lined up so stay tuned.)
End result? Inspiration, the satisfaction that I’m being true to myself and YOU. Fear dissolved.
Action #4 — The big one. I moved my family to Florida, my home state. We’re closer to our families, the water and a near 0% chance of seeing snow. I’m playing music again and I splash in the water with my daughter regularly. My wife told me yesterday, “You are so much more relaxed these days.” I feel so much more available as a husband and father.
End result: Peace of mind, greater fun, ease and joy. I’m less of an asshole. Fear dissolved. Also, truth be told, a little aroused from increased exposure to lovely bikini clad ladies
MAKING A SPLASH
Now, I’m not going to bullshit you and say that my life is without its challenges (I woke up grumpy and funky yesterday). But I’d rather deal with a “real” challenge head on instead of an imagined one from the top of that figurative diving board.
I still have a lot to do, but the main point here is that I’m no longer stuck wondering WHAT to do.
Looking into a crystal ball it’s easy to imagine how standing on that diving board for much longer could have taken a BIG toll on my marriage, my relationship with my daughter, my family’s security as well as my overall sense of confidence and well-being as a man.
SO WHAT ABOUT YOU?
Maybe you’re on a diving board of your own. Maybe you’re wrestling with the fears of the unknown.
Maybe the heavy costs you’re facing are:
- losing your marriage (have you seen what a divorce costs?)
- losing your kids or
- losing your financial security
Ultimately, standing there — frozen — on this diving board is holding you back from living your kickass life and instead you’re manifesting a life of regrets.
Maybe you know that something’s gotta change soon. Maybe you just don’t know how to make that change. I get it. If this is you[intlink id=”892″ type=”page”] email me and let’s discuss how I can help you take the leap without losing your ass[/intlink].
In the coming weeks I’ll continue to share stories, tips and tools to help you KEEP what matters most to you while also doing what you love in a way that has meaning and purpose. I’m also developing some goodies for those of you who are ready to take the leap for yourself. In the meantime, I’d love to hear from you, how you could use some help and what you’d like to do to move forward.
Thanks again for reading and supporting The New Man.
PS Please forward this post to a friend who you think may benefit from this experience.